I sit down to write today’s post and within a minute, hear a familiar horn. The master of the house is back. As I rush to open the gate, I feel a frisson of irritation. “There’s always some interruption just when I sit down to write,” I fume inwardly. Ironic, considering the topic on which I wanted to write.
With effort, I halt the mental diarrhoea that’s threatening to strike. “Check what you said just now. Always some interruption, you grumbled – is that really true? Today is day 27 of the blogathon – and except for two or three days, you’ve been left undisturbed to do your thing. 3 out of 27 is not ‘always’ – don’t exaggerate,” my mind says to me.
It turns out hubby wants dinner at once, so I make the chapattis and serve him. Then I realize it’s almost my dinner time, so I decide to finish my meal before sitting down to write. During this process of making, serving and eating dinner, I get a few more thoughts about what to write. Blood glucose levels rise, and I’m altogether feeling more cheerful as I get back to writing the blog.
Today’s post was going to be about negative self-talk. Thanks to this incident, I got an actual example to demonstrate it.
Whether you realize it or not, you do talk to yourself – that is called self-talk. And our internal monologue has a huge impact on how we feel. When we’re feeling bad, we get upset; this affects our focus and communication, too, and often paves the way for more unpleasant stuff to happen.
So what you need to do is stop the cycle from going ahead. How?
Go back to my example.
First, I realized where my thoughts were going.
Next, I challenged a thought I had slipped into.
Then I said, “So what if there’s a small interruption?” and adapted to the new situation
I looked for what positive came out of the disturbance.
So, here’s my SOP (Standard Operating Procedure) to stop negative self-talk.
1. Identify the negative thought
2. Ask if the thought is true/false
3. Question the possibilities with “So what?”
4. Change over to a positive viewpoint
5. Act accordingly
6. Look for the lesson
7. Repeat next time
There you have it – the secret to being more relaxed, less uptight, and feeling better about your life.
All said and done, some things will happen the way they will. Accept them you must. Whether you do so gracefully or are brought there kicking and screaming is entirely up to you.