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Saturday, 25 November 2017

NaBloPoMo 2017: Day 25: Creating your destiny....

I’m always amazed at how we take people and things at face value, and realize almost nothing about their back story, unless they choose to reveal it themselves.

Today, I’m presenting one such back story that a reader shared. She does not wish to reveal her identity because she says her intention is to not hurt anybody after all these years. And yet, despite the risk of being recognized, she’s willing to share her experience because she hopes that her story will help women realize the importance of being not just educated, but also self-sufficient. So, here’s the story of K as I would like to call her….

I was an average student at college not because I was not intelligent but because I was not disciplined and did not know the value of education. You can gauge my immature approach from the fact that I was just waiting to get married so that I can stop studying! Fortunately, I was married into a so-called rich and highly educated family, at 21, soon after my basic degree.

Dreaming of eating whatever I want, sleeping whenever I want and a generally easy-going life, I could not believe my luck. I stepped into the family, thinking I was a FREE bird now. Little did I know what was in store for me. 

Forget about freedom of doing or talking, no individual of the family was allowed the freedom to even “think”…. 

I had been born and brought up in a middle class family, full of love and freedom. Here, after marriage, I needed permission to even sit and stand, and had to blindly follow instructions, and do only what was told – no freedom to use my mind, also….

That was when I slowly realized the true value of education. I waited for more than a decade to muster courage to put my foot down and finally started expressing my wants and likes and more importantly – started studying again.

So, I went back to college, did my Masters, stood first in the University and went ahead to do a dozen certificate and diploma courses in my chosen subject and finally completed my PhD.

I was someone who complained of food not being tasty when my mother lovingly cooked and fed me each day and yet, I did not bother to study despite all the comforts and care given to me. After my marriage, when I finally did all these courses, it was with a lot of hardship. I had to do all the work and cooking at home, and take care of my children, their studies, games, and activities.

I realize now that I had undermined the value of being educated. It has brought so much courage, confidence and respect that the very same people who once looked down upon me, now look up to me for everything.

Every woman has to be educated to ensure her own safety and not be abused, in any way.

My purpose in sharing this story is not to blame the ones who abuse. Rather, I am blaming myself for not being responsible enough. Once a woman is educated, chances of people abusing her in any way, are less, and she can stand up for herself in any situation, is what I want to convey.

Like Swami Vivekananda said, "Stand up, be bold, be strong. Take the whole responsibility on your own shoulders, and know that you are the creator of your own destiny."

I got acquainted with K through a friend’s friend, when I was sourcing information for an article for a new website. It was supposed to be a regular assignment and I was happy to meet K because now, I had a credible source for my articles. But after a month or two, all communication from that site ceased and I never did get to know if those articles were published or not.

I’ve always felt bad about this unexplained silence of that website, because I wasn’t able to get back to my sources with a link to the article that quotes them. And I also pondered - what could be the purpose of this seemingly random episode. 

Today, after reading K’s story, that I knew nothing of when I interacted with her previously, I think I know the answer. That random episode was yet another serendipitous event to put me in touch with an inspiring person whose story is sure to be a motivation to many others….

1 comment:

  1. Inspiring story reflecting importance of empowering women with decent education. Happy to note that she got a second chance to pursue her education and attain her true potential. Not every one will be so lucky and hence important to grab it at the first opportunity.


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