When I’d asked people for their insights at the beginning of this month, a cousin of my husband said she would write back to me shortly. When there was no reply for a long time after, I was wondering why it was taking her so long to send a few thoughts along. And then, one fine day, this document landed in my inbox and I knew why it had taken time – because she had made the effort required to write it in a ‘ready-to-publish’ form.
Read on to know what Vidya Suresh, who works for an IT major in Chennai, has to share….
When I think about success, I don’t really feel I can share my practices as success tips…they are more like tips for peace of mind, which, in turn can lead to success.
According to me success is something that varies from person to person even for the same competition of Birth to Death. Like getting a heavy breakfast is success for someone who’s deprived of food, and replacing heavy breakfast with a mild one is a success for another person who’s aiming at weight reduction.
So considering peace of mind, I can mention 2 things that have worked for me.
1. Find positivity in everything you see and undergo
Though I started with this accidentally, I have tried to retain that habit within me after realizing its benefits. Generally, for any working person, promotion is one of the key morale boosters and of course, partly a money booster as well. More so when it has been pending for quite some time.
I lost my promotion, on a minor margin of just 30 days. The other candidate had been waiting for it for the past 17 months, whereas I was waiting for it for the last 16 months. Not my fault. But as per company rules, it could be given to only one person and so, it went to the other person. It was quite a disappointment for me since I felt that the management could have tried to make an exemption and provided recognition to both of us. But it did not happen.
Later, when I analyzed it, I realized that I couldn’t have done anything more than what I had already done by performing well. My manager was of the same opinion as well. When I was trying to get over this disappointment, when it struck me, “I did not get the promotion, but I’m lucky to have got a good manager, who shared the fact openly with me, which is a really positive thing.”
If you think about it, you can grow without material benefits, for some time, but never without good people around you. So, learn to look at and appreciate the supportive people you have around you.
Losing a promotion provided me an opportunity to understand that there are people around you, who care for you, share the truth with you. That gave me the peace of mind to move ahead.
2. React to mistakes of others like you would to your child.
This is the second attitude that I am currently practicing. When things don’t go well with someone and they make mistakes, or rather, when I think they make a mistake, I try to treat them as my closest ones, young ones, like a mother or father handles a small kid.
When my kid is making a mistake, what do you do? You don’t just get angry and move away from him or her, right? Initially, you get angry, yes, but you can’t ignore the matter; you need to resolve it. But how?
You pacify the kid, explain things, if he is not accepting on first attempt, you keep telling the same, and try to explain again. If it doesn’t work out, you reach out to someone else, who can help resolve it.
When we practice this with our kids, we end up raising good children. When we practice it with others, we end up retaining the relationship and bring up a matured soul within our own selves.
I am practicing both these attitudes with other people to the maximum extent possible. In official as well as personal matters. Because, at the end of the day, relationships are what matter the most!!
Well….what’s left for me to say that Vidya hasn’t already !!
Oh yes…one thing…that I’ve ‘discovered’ three potential writers in the family!!
Read on to know what Vidya Suresh, who works for an IT major in Chennai, has to share….
When I think about success, I don’t really feel I can share my practices as success tips…they are more like tips for peace of mind, which, in turn can lead to success.
According to me success is something that varies from person to person even for the same competition of Birth to Death. Like getting a heavy breakfast is success for someone who’s deprived of food, and replacing heavy breakfast with a mild one is a success for another person who’s aiming at weight reduction.
So considering peace of mind, I can mention 2 things that have worked for me.
1. Find positivity in everything you see and undergo
Though I started with this accidentally, I have tried to retain that habit within me after realizing its benefits. Generally, for any working person, promotion is one of the key morale boosters and of course, partly a money booster as well. More so when it has been pending for quite some time.
I lost my promotion, on a minor margin of just 30 days. The other candidate had been waiting for it for the past 17 months, whereas I was waiting for it for the last 16 months. Not my fault. But as per company rules, it could be given to only one person and so, it went to the other person. It was quite a disappointment for me since I felt that the management could have tried to make an exemption and provided recognition to both of us. But it did not happen.
Later, when I analyzed it, I realized that I couldn’t have done anything more than what I had already done by performing well. My manager was of the same opinion as well. When I was trying to get over this disappointment, when it struck me, “I did not get the promotion, but I’m lucky to have got a good manager, who shared the fact openly with me, which is a really positive thing.”
If you think about it, you can grow without material benefits, for some time, but never without good people around you. So, learn to look at and appreciate the supportive people you have around you.
Losing a promotion provided me an opportunity to understand that there are people around you, who care for you, share the truth with you. That gave me the peace of mind to move ahead.
2. React to mistakes of others like you would to your child.
This is the second attitude that I am currently practicing. When things don’t go well with someone and they make mistakes, or rather, when I think they make a mistake, I try to treat them as my closest ones, young ones, like a mother or father handles a small kid.
When my kid is making a mistake, what do you do? You don’t just get angry and move away from him or her, right? Initially, you get angry, yes, but you can’t ignore the matter; you need to resolve it. But how?
You pacify the kid, explain things, if he is not accepting on first attempt, you keep telling the same, and try to explain again. If it doesn’t work out, you reach out to someone else, who can help resolve it.
When we practice this with our kids, we end up raising good children. When we practice it with others, we end up retaining the relationship and bring up a matured soul within our own selves.
I am practicing both these attitudes with other people to the maximum extent possible. In official as well as personal matters. Because, at the end of the day, relationships are what matter the most!!
Well….what’s left for me to say that Vidya hasn’t already !!
Oh yes…one thing…that I’ve ‘discovered’ three potential writers in the family!!
Congrats Mrs Anu,for creating writers in our family.
ReplyDeleteThank you ! I'm happy they have responded :-)
DeleteGreat Vidhya for this your positive attitude almighty will bless with still higher position and more monetary benefits. I am proud of you.
ReplyDeleteNamaskara Atthige, thamma chinthane matthu vicharagalu namma elarigu ondu daari deepa.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I'm happy that my efforts are useful !
DeleteThoughtful blog thanks for posting
ReplyDelete